Saint-Amand and d'Alt escorted us home from the circus. It was raining in torrents. When I believe in people's sincerity, I am neither cruel nor...
The amusing thing is *Le Figaro* reporting that the Cassagnac family gathered for the baptism at the Chateau de Garges (Seine-et-Oise) at the home of...
How could I have known nothing of yesterday's tremendous session? That is a trick my painting played on me. I knew, of course, that they would be...
Monsieur Camille Lefevre, a second-prize winner of the Prix de Rome and currently competing to win the first, recommended to me by Julian, gave me my...
I went out all day; we paid a few calls, to Adeline, to the Goldsmids. Then to the Bois.
At the Opera, with the Gavinis, the Count and Countess Murat, Chaudordy, Nervo, de Graves, Rivoli, etc. The Marquis Casa-Riera came with his...
Tony was very kind --- advice, exhortations, encouragement; my portrait is not bad at all, the hair is good. At last!
I did some modeling in the morning.
The reply to Soutzo is quite an undertaking... I have labored furiously over my arguments; if he were my equal he would understand an improvisation,...
I worked like a bricklayer until half past nine in the evening. I have not yet sent the... dissertation to Soutzo. Is it worth the trouble? ==That is...
Instead of painting, I take Miss Graham and we go to the rue de Sevres and spend nearly an hour there opposite the Jesuit houses. But it was nine...
Mademoiselle Marie del Sarte, who gave me my first sculpture lessons, and her sister dined with us this evening. When paying for the lessons, I gave...
Whether I love Cassagnac or not, what I know is that when I imagine myself saying "I love you," he is the only one to whom I could say it, and he is...
Yesterday we went to the Senate, but it was only the preparation for today's great session: the amnesty. It was Turquan-deux who got us into the...
Yesterday I sent Soutzo the dissertation copied by a public scribe. But I may as well say it: it is purely for myself, he will not understand it, and...
It is I who am surprised to find Soutzo upon my return. A peculiar surprise: I had written to a man who was far away, and here he arrives asking for...
The new portrait I have sketched has had such success with Rodolphe that he took it downstairs to the men's atelier to prove that women are capable.
Wodzinski poses, then to the Chamber with mother Gavini and my aunt. Same box as yesterday. Same crowd everywhere. The debate came but no one shone....
Rosita dined with us; she is a little hothead, very Spanish.
The day before yesterday my aunt went to the Comedie-Francaise with the Gavinis, and Gabriel came to the box; he has not left Paris. I shall never...
I have just returned from driving in the Bois with my aunt and the Gavinis. We talked as usual about a bit of everything; the Audiffrets were...
This morning I happened to show Julian my reply to Soutzo, and in the evening, returning from the drive with my aunt and Oelsnitz, we find the said...
The Tchoumakoffs at dinner and then Soutzo; I make him dance with Leonie. But I never like him so much as when we talk about Cassagnac. I say that he...
Anniversary of the storming of the Bastille. Review, distribution of flags, illuminations, celebrations, balls at every crossroads.
The Tchoumakoffs, the del Sartes, and Cerny dined with us.
Julian finds my painting very good, very good, and Amelie is obliged to say that it is not bad, for Julian is more severe than Tony.
Tony told me that if I do several studies pushed as far as this one, it will do me a great deal of good. That it is a likeness, very well drawn. This...
At Julian's, with Villevieille to fetch my keys forgotten yesterday. That man encourages me greatly; I leave with a good impression. What is a relief...
I have begun my treatment. They come to fetch you in a padded sedan chair. A costume of white flannel, footed trousers, and hood and cloak.
I admit the elevation to supreme power of a man, when that man is a hero like Napoleon I; I admit that a sort of dictatorship may be conferred upon a...
I stay at home all day, the treatment being finished at half past five in the morning (begun at four), after which one stays in bed for an hour. And...
They sent me white batiste dresses from Paris; they fit well. I dressed, with a pretty hat. We went out, and now I read and play the guitar.
Treatment interrupted.
Courtes is getting married; I send him a telegram of congratulations. He is marrying the daughter of a former stockbroker, Dubois; there must be...
I am better, and here is something about my Prince [In the margin: Prince Jerome Bonaparte]; he is not an ordinary man, I assure you.
[In the margin: Treatment resumed this morning.] Yesterday I began my painting on a size 25 canvas. The arrangement is quite simple. The two children...
A torrential rain! I take advantage of it to paint a corner of the artistic joiner's shop, on a size 6 canvas. I have myself carried there and back...
Wodzinski comes to see us, which means I go out for a moment, and they take him to the drawing room where he introduces us to that old type, the...
Here is a letter from Julian and a reply with a composition representing my departure for work: four or five little peasants and Rosalie carrying the...
Up there, up there on the mountain,
I was painting in the shop when my aunt arrived with Nervo, or rather Potin, who has just arrived with freshly made gossip. First he tells me that...
We go riding --- Potin, I, and a very nice young lady whose name I do not know. Talk to me about Mont-Dore when one gets away from it. That's more...
Another ride, alone with Potin; we talked about my Prince, and naturally, like all the rotten Bonapartists, he likes neither his ideas nor his...
Potin sent me a bouquet. We went to mass, then riding: Mlle Moreau, her brother, Potin, Mlle Devick (?), and I.
Riding: Devick, Potin, and I. The rides are charming here.
I had asked my harp teacher for mandolin music. Here is his reply. I also told him that I had won a medal for a painting and exhibited another. I...
We went on too long a ride; five hours on horseback with this weakening treatment, and I am broken, in the exact sense of the word.
I am worth nothing this morning, eyes and head tired. And to think that I do not leave until Saturday! Today I have not time; tomorrow is Friday, and...
The day before yesterday I wrote three pages on freedom of thought (not to be confused with freethought), and today I find my complaints in letter XV...
Eight o'clock. How pretty and comfortable my study seems to me!
I went to the atelier. Julian is absent, in Marseille for a month; but all these ladies cry out on seeing me! I brought a lace set to Amelie, who...
I have received a slap in the face that I probably can never return. They bring me a letter with the London postmark, and I find in it an obscene...
Alexis is on holiday.
Meissner dines here with Mme Cerny. Olga has been married for nearly three years. Marie for only five months.
Meissner reminds me of the year 1875, and I find there the day I laughed the most in my whole life: Saturday, 22 May 1875. I have never laughed so...
I went to fetch Amelie at the atelier, and we go to look for a place to paint in the Bois. Passing through Passy, we go to ask for news of Tony's...
Rosalie claims to have seen Soutzo yesterday; he must have seen the shutters open as he passed. So it would be amusing if my wager proved me right.
"He read a great deal, moreover; he gave himself that profound and serious instruction that one owes only to oneself and to which all people of...
Cassagnac wrote a very good article on the anniversary; it happens to him rarely enough for the fact to be noted.
Wodzinski accompanies us to the theater where Rochefort's lecture had been announced, but no more Rochefort than on the palm of my hand; we come back...
Old Tchoumakoff at dinner, but we do not agree. He believes one cannot love both Zola and Musset. Besides, he is for the kind of painting that......
It is raining; one would need... all the worst incidents of my existence parade through my head, and there are things, already distant, that make me...
I take lessons from the Black woman, who is excessively funny with her Spanish-French pidgin.
Great commotion for my aunt. Fauvel, who examined me a week ago and found nothing, examined me today and found the bronchial tubes affected; he...
The day before yesterday Soutzo arrived around two o'clock. My aunt invited him to dinner, and so he returned at seven. We spoke of indifferent...
Here is a stupid note from Soutzo that I received yesterday morning along with a bouquet.
I hope he has properly left this time. The packet boat departs Saturday from Marseille. But let us bury Soutzo and talk of myself, to record the...
I said to myself, just to see, that I would say yes to Soutzo — convinced that an obstacle would arise the moment I said yes. Well — it happened. If...
Monsieur Kaverine — a civil servant from Akhtyrka, a small town where we spent a year twelve years ago and where Monsieur Georges committed every...
Kaverine and his wife dine with us.
My doctor told me the day before yesterday that I may recover and that in any case I shall hear better than at present... Well then! And today there...
I have been running around the shops and ordering dresses as if I needed them. The eighteen Biarritz dresses are mouldering in the wardrobes. I sent...
This evening we go to the Palais-Royal with the two old men. I had hoped they would bring Gabriel — but the scoundrels never thought of it.
A good day, begun in the night. I dreamed of Cassagnac. He was plain and unwell — but that is nothing. I understand now that one does not love for...
Since yesterday I have been white-skinned and fresh and pretty enough to astonish myself. My eyes are lively and bright; even the contour of my face...
We went to the circus yesterday; I went there to display my face in its beauty. Berthe had come to ask herself to dinner, and I steered her onto the...
A lady (a fellow student) whose portrait I am to paint pays for it by posing for a hand study. Tony was adorable — he was about to correct the Jewish...