Sunday, 3 June 1883 — Grand Prix

My aunt, Dina, Mme Gavini and I.
We go out only for the return from the races. I wanted to look very well, and I do. I neglect myself too often; for more than a year now I have almost always worn the same hat, which does not suit me, and any dress at all. The reason is that I go out only on business, and then I make the mistake of thinking it does not matter to me. From now on I mean always to be well turned out; that does not prevent one from having talent... So I dress in ecru white, with a white straw hat trimmed with white wings and a white feather. A rather small hat, but very becoming. The dress is trimmed with very delicate embroidery, the waistcoat is embroidered all over, and the bodice ties in front like a kind of Figaro jacket. The effect is very smart and at the same time restrained. If one dresses extravagantly one cannot tell what effect one produces, for then it is the dress people look at. Am I mad or wise to confine myself to barracks instead of going about everywhere... Well! I have already answered that: I have no choice!...
I should be so pretty if I went out a great deal and thought of nothing else. Without being a regular beauty, I am graceful and radiant... When I am in a good humour... And it seems to me that if, like other women, I thought only of pleasing, I would succeed... But I do not think of it at all, except once in a while by chance, and then it is forced and no longer works.