# Saturday, 17 February 1877

Saturday, 17 February 1877

I rose early and we went to see the Grotto of Pausilippe — now that I like — and then Virgil’s tomb. To the point! I am upset: Larderel’s coachman leaves tomorrow, so he will not return for a fortnight as he said — if he returns at all. The delay of that wretched Charles... seemed to me a sign of a speedy return... Here I was interrupted by Altamura; this excellent fellow was hurt by our manner on the balcony day, but really he is a nice dog... fie! the way I express myself!
written across the page
Ah! Dido, ah! Aeneas, ah! Larderel.
I skated and amused myself — there was the one we take for Prince Ruffo, and the officer who saw Larderel off, a superb young man, and Merisano the monkey of last year, and the suave young man, and many others; I was in white with two braids down my back like Marguerite, and a black velvet cap. What do you expect — it is only natural that people should take a little interest in us; we are brand-new here.
The coachman’s departure sends shocks of disappointment through me; I undertake an enquiry with Rosalie, having her repeat how Larderel would come home early and in the morning leap from his bed to look through the keyhole; then the pantomime with Charles who would signal him to come when he caught sight of someone; how Larderel would knock the coachman aside, then take his head in his hands and bound across the room crying: Ah! Good Lord, good Lord! This gesture and these words are peculiar to him — approaching Cancello he took his head in his hands crying, “Good Lord, good Lord — here is Cancello!”
Here is something carefully gathered.
The coachman makes all sorts of enquiries about me — whether I like horses, whether I have a good temper, and so on and so on — and at last, satisfied, he declares that I am the woman his master needs. Then the coachman and the lady’s maid arrange the marriage. But that is not the question at issue; the question is departure or arrival. Charles is no longer leaving — he has received orders from the Palace where the Count of Mirafiori summons him, about horses for Larderel; besides, every moment it is something else... Ah! and can I not hold to what this Bijou-bouzouk himself said!
I will hear no mention of any change — it torments me too much. If at least it were love
I am wild about this Larderel — to hear Rosalie tell it, he is equally so about me. Rosalie told me this before seeing how interested I was, and told it to me as something indifferent but extraordinary.
— He is a madman, said Altamura again this evening — sometimes he throws away a hundred thousand francs, other times he makes a fuss over two sous.
You know, the coachman is finding me a saddle horse to hire, through the agency of the precious Rosalie. Without this girl I should not know what to do.
I should very much like to know how long he will last this year — in spite of myself I am venturing further into these amorous notions, and then, if he were not to follow me there, it would be a disappointment.
I have seen him just enough to be irritated and a little mad.
If I followed my inclination I should spend hours writing down the smallest details about the coachman, the lady’s maid, the horses, the Countess of Mirafiore who left today for Florence and whom Bijou-bouzouk will come to receive in Rome and escort back to Florence at last.
True — I feel something for him... Audiffret came with dreadful slowness; Antonelli came as a result of the communicative influence of Love upon me; as for this family man — well, he came like a thunderbolt. He is the most real of the three; but from the portrait I draw of him you will perceive well enough, will you not, that he is not yet the ideal — or what I shall one day judge to be such.
O boredom — what do you not engender!

Notes

The Grotto of Pausilippe (Grotta di Seiano) — a Roman-era tunnel through the Posilipo hill near Naples; nearby is the traditional site identified as Virgil’s tomb (Parco Virgiliano). ↩
Bijou-bouzouk — Marie’s playful nickname for Larderel, combining bijou (jewel) with bashi-bazouk (irregular Turkish soldier, used colloquially for a turbulent character). ↩