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Monday, 25 June 1883
Already yesterday evening I had returned to the works sent from Rome1; I see them again this morning and the evening’s impression is confirmed. It is curious how I never take in things at first sight — I see paintings much better two days after viewing them than when I look at them. I took this peculiarity for stupidity, but Balzac reassures me — he says that in many great minds perspicacity is not spontaneous; that in natures gifted with the faculty of living much in the present, second sight needs a kind of sleep to identify itself with causes. Richelieu was like this. In any case, Schommer’s painting is abominable — empty, stupid, conventional... and execrable. Doucet’s is truly ravishing in colour, and the technique makes one think of Bastien and even of A. Morot in his Temptation of Saint Anthony... But it does not stand up as thought and character. That tone alone, and nothing else.Lundi 25 juin 1883
Without believing I am consumptive — for my hair is increasing in very considerable proportions and is truly beautiful now, though only reaching to my waist —
Sans croire que je suis poitrinaire car mes cheveux augmentent dans des proportions très considérables, ils sont vraiment beaux à présent quoique venant seulement jusqu’à la ceinture.
Bojidar came this evening with his dog — for want of better... it is something, at least. But I cannot do without an intimate being who will remain there, ready to listen to everything, nod in agreement, recount stories! Man or woman. Alice played the confidante; Captain Blanc in the old days, and the architect more significant than Alice or Bojidar because of Jules... In our household there is always someone who is the intimate friend, who is coddled, to whom one tells everything, and who ends by committing some petty meanness.
Bojidar est venu ce soir avec son chien, faute de mieux... c’est toujours ça. Mais je ne puis me passer d’un être intime qui reste là prêt à tout écouter, à opiner du bonnet, à raconter des histoires ! Homme ou femme. Alice a joué les confidentes; le capitaine Blanc dans le temps, et l’architecte plus important qu’Alice ou Bojidar à cause de Jules... Chez nous il y a toujours quelqu’un qui est l’ami intime qu’on choie, à qui on raconte tout et qui finit par faire quelque petite vilenie.
With Bojidar that danger is past — one need only thrash him if he misbehaves. Jules has returned to Paris. Bojidar has seen him.
Avec Bojidar ça n’est plus à craindre, il n’y aura qu’à le rosser s’il ne marche pas droit. Jules est rentré à Paris. Bojidar l’a vu.
Saint-Amand came this morning, still besotted.
Saint-Amand est venu ce matin toujours toqué.
Notes
In French in the original: envois de Rome. The works that the Prix de Rome pensioners at the Villa Medici sent to Paris each year. ↩