Saturday, 13 January / 1 January 1877

[words crossed out] Having gone to bed at six in the morning, I was late for church.
Pelikan lunched with us; then I went out alone in the carriage to do a little shopping. I met Galula.
Then we go to the Ska Barnola sent us (Dina and me) two ravishing little porcelain baskets full of sweets.
Bihovetz came himself, and then Collignon.
A few visiting cards.
Then the Skating — a great crowd; I skated fast and well, but my aunt is vexed because Audiffret did not ask me to skate with him.
But! on the whole it is wretched. You meet the Souvoroff, who makes a thousand friendly speeches to you, then a few people bow to you, and that is all. And then... it is wretched!
The Anitchkoffs. And in the evening we go to their house, and then I am bored. But at least I am free; I no longer expect anything or anyone. So I shall go to Paris; in Rome I would suffer too much; in Paris one is lost in the crowd... Oh!!!!!!
Only Carnival... I shall give myself leave again for this last Carnival. I shall not spend it in Rome to watch the balls and festivities pass under my nose, and to go out on the balcony to hear Plowden recount where he has been and with whom so-and-so danced. And then those others who will ask you: Don’t you go into society? Have you seen your ambassador? etc. And then... to watch all the others enjoying themselves while one tortures oneself!
Last winter they kept saying: next winter we shall take her into society; at present she is too young. I shall go to Naples, where they won’t ...
Ah! Misery of miseries!