Saturday, 13 March 1875

Dina and Lubimoff — that is the news of the day. Maria Bogdanova Anitchkova, in great secrecy, sends word to Maman through Pâris that Lubimoff is going to ask for Dina’s hand. My opinion on the subject cannot count: I judge somewhat by myself, and so for myself.
Lubimoff is a horrid little man. Still, Dina ought to hurry; if I am not mistaken she is twenty — when we left Odessa they said she was the same age as Miloradovitch, and Miloradovitch was fifteen. That was in 1870. But in any case Dina is twenty, or rather will be next May, in two months.
Unfortunately she copies me in everything and, like me, wants a Prince Charming, which on her part strikes me as quite comical.
I have sent for my books; in a month and a half I shall have them, and then I shall devote myself entirely to classical, sacred and philosophical reading. Truly, I look forward to that time impatiently. After La Dame de volupté I am disgusted with Dumas. The wretched count came today; I am very cold and very polite with him.
How poor a thing — to live to the age of sixteen and have had only one admirer. It is true that we know nobody, and that perhaps I have had unknown admirers, just as several have had me for their unknown admirer too. Ah! When, my God, will you let me truly live!

Notes

Marie’s title is French: La Dame de volupté (“The Lady of Sensual Pleasure”). ↩