Tuesday, 30 December 1873

[One illegible line]
We saw diadia; he is amiable as always, but I see that he knows how my aunt, carried away one day, berated Seraphine.
The Comtesse de Mouzay and her daughter came, but I have them told I am asleep.
It is terribly cold, so cold that my nose was red. We go to Monier's -- Maman, my aunt, Dina and I -- but while these ladies were trying things on, I ordered the carriage to pass by the Promenade. There is a military band (brown dress, brown hat, good) and some people. Gioia in a wretched outfit. Speaking of Gioia, she had a reveillon at her house, and toward the end everyone was tipsy; then Krassowsky proposed they go to the Cercle de la Mediterranee. They took a barrel organ and went to the club, but near the door Krassowsky fell with his nose to the ground, and they were chased away. This scandal has caused some stir in Nice, and I confess to my shame that I adore hearing such things said.
Dina told me she had seen a carriage like Carry's, with two servants in livery, and that on the box beside the coachman was seated -- she challenged me to guess; I thought Boreel, but no, it is Count Lambertye. As she said these words, from the edge of the horizon came rushing furiously that famous carriage; Auguste, turning:
-- Mademoiselle, look what a pretty equipage.
Indeed I see that monstrous machine -- in the middle a coupe for four, behind a seat for two haiduks, and in front a seat for the coachman, beside whom sat the little count, all pinched with cold and hunched! All the carriages turned toward this Noah's Ark. I do not find this machine elegant; it is merely curious, even grotesque. We saw it twice more with Maman, etc.; these ladies mock it and call him the little clown. My aunt claims he looks at me and that it is for me he invented this carriage. Dina too says he stared a great deal at the shoot. I did not notice him much; however, he does look a good deal -- but respectfully; he even came to the side where we were and stayed a few minutes. But he looks respectfully, and I like that.
We were at Raynaud and Bussi's when the twisted neck stops and looks through the door. He too stares at me. I assumed a candid air, and we went out.
I walked with Hitchcock (in the conspirateur) as far as No. 17, then returned by the Avenue de la Gare.
How I detest the fire -- and they heat the salon and the dining room; I cannot bear the heat on my face!
[In the margin: I read the Apocalypse; I did not fall asleep this time.] I thought of the Duke of Hamilton on seeing that carriage; I thought of his carriage at Baden-Baden.
I cannot continue reading the Derby, which I have just taken up. The Duke of Hamilton is commissioner of the races and of the shoot at Nice. He will come -- with her. Oh povera me!

^[Italian in the original: "Oh, poor me!"]
And yet to read it one would say that nothing has changed! That... Oh! My God, this paper draws me in.......................................... I find nothing more than a horse I did not know: Damy, belonging to him.
Can one conceive this sudden change? I was, a minute ago, calm -- and here I am overwhelmed and ready to weep.
My God, nothing can remedy what I lament; I shall pray to Thee and seek consolation in Thee.