Saturday, 12 May 1877

I dreamt of the Countess.
It is ridiculous to say, but my heart sinks when I look out of the window. Such sadness at leaving Florence...
I have not seen Niccolini, you know... no matter, there is an American here, a thoroughly disagreeable one, who must resemble him, I think; therefore Niccolini is disagreeable, and away with him.
Going to Nice! I am preparing for it as if for crossing a desert; I should like to shave my head so as to be spared the trouble of doing my hair... speaking of hair, I have cut mine like Blanche’s, and I am quite delighted.
Every time I reread my explanations I find them simply stupid... I find them so because I am so full of this man, and above all of everything that concerns him, that it seems to me everyone must know it, understand it and think as I do. All these I like him, I love him thicken and spoil the light, adorable feeling he has inspired in me.
Light? Yes or no — how do I know?
We are packing, we are off!
The ink dries on my pen before I can bring myself to write a word, so obsessed am I by regrets.

Notes

In Italian in the original: via. ↩