Tuesday, 16 April 1878

I go to the atelier in the morning at least. At six o'clock, once Schaeppi has left, I went out with maman, but I looked at no one — I read a newspaper the whole time. I want to read that wretched Le Pays, or another, attentively every day, in order to be informed of the serious things taking place between the different parties.
I am calmer and once again on the mountain from the heights of which I see only one star in the sky — that of my future... and when I reach it I shall turn my gaze toward the earth. But my evenings are unoccupied; I read, and it tires my eyes.
Berthe writes a letter to maman, in which she begs pardon for the trouble she must have caused, and announces her marriage — signing herself Berthe Lancaster.
No matter — without her I might perhaps enjoy myself a little more than I do. May she be happy — but if her misfortune could redeem her vileness... I would hesitate.