I slept until noon, and I find Varpahovsky at luncheon. He is a gentleman who is half blind — but it seems to me he is so morally as well as physically.

I am tired; it is raining; I stay home all day.

"If only I had been able to foresee," my aunt exclaims at luncheon, "that you would involve yourself with the Audiffrets! Ah! my God! If you continue to busy yourself with these moujiks I shall curse you!"

She says this because since this morning I have spoken of nothing but the old man.

We have finally managed to obtain Fanny Lear — the book written by the mistress of the unfortunate Grand Duke Nicolas Konstantinovich.

She describes their first meeting — I was reading aloud in the dining room.

"He took my hand and said to me with a laugh: 'You call this a hand? It is a little bird's paw!'"

"Oh," my aunt interrupted, "that has been said before — just as has: 'you swim like a little fish.'" She continued — while I blushed like a cherry.

"By whom?" asks Maman. "By him?"

"Oh! Maman, I beg you — do not make me blush over trifles!" I cried, blushing more and more, my head bent over the book — for I had tears in my eyes, both from my blushes and from a charming memory.

What would you have! One is sixteen — or one is not.

[In the margin: I do not understand what pleasure my family takes in fanning this flame! It is quite astonishing. But my family is idiotic.]

I was planning a family evening and wanted to go to bed at nine o'clock — but all the Sapogenikoffs arrive for dinner in full opera dress, and I go with them, dressed and coiffed exactly as yesterday. Yourkoff goes out near the Cercle Masséna and Marie feels indisposed and returns — so we arrive at the theatre only three.

Léon is in his box, but I make no faces — for with him and beside him are all the Arsons in the world, girls and boys. At the first interval we are nearly dying of laughter with Giro — and I hid behind the formidable person of Nina, joining my hands around her stomach; I have long arms, but — it must be said in her favour — they barely sufficed for her waist. And why? Because père leaned toward one of the Arson girls in the box next to his, so that his nose stood out vividly against the white of the column, and I said:

"Look, Giro — Léon's nose is so white that it blends with the white partition between the boxes."

We were on the first floor, and the people in the parterre — Pépino's brother — were watching us; Giro began to laugh and I nearly choked.

I am beginning to feel at the Opera as at the Théâtre-Français — as at home.

Cresci is in the box next to ours and addresses me a magnificent bow, which I return with a small familiar nod and a smile of superb condescension.

Léon studies me through his glasses the whole time, then comes to the front of his box, looks at me, puts on his hat — and a moment later finds himself in Cresci's box, where he remains a few minutes.

Not a soul I know — and I am gay and content. As arranged, Maman comes to fetch me at ten o'clock; at half past ten we leave — and at the same moment, Léon. What a charming young rogue.

But we had another distraction: Guiglia, our octogenarian neighbour — Saëtone's uncle. We study him through our glasses and laugh; he looks at us and smiles. He has more than two wigs — like the Duke of Brunswick.¹

At dinner, the Sapogenikoffs, Yourkoff, Varpahovsky and all the rest spoke of nothing but Audiffret. They discussed his amorous conquests, the devastation he causes — Marie even went so far as to say he could make a royal mantle out of nothing but hearts. Maman and my aunt recounted his successes — so that here I am once again carried away: I was on the point of spitting on him, but they celebrate him so much that my giddy head is turned again, and once more I think him the most beautiful of Don Juans.

Tomorrow I send him this:

Wretch!

If you continue to frequent Gros your reputation with women is lost! You will become a Choulowsky (I misspell this name on purpose). And then truly you will rot in vice. Do not be so often with Gros — he will ruin you. This is a friend's advice.