Monday, 5 May 1873

Fine weather. At the promenade with Mme Markevitch, who has been lodging downstairs with us for two months. Mlle Collignon is ill; she has lost her voice and can barely speak — I do not know if it is a cold or her Indian. I call him so, because he was in India to make his fortune, always promising to marry her when he shall be rich enough. As if could not work being married, I think better than alone. She believed, and he is married and has left her in the lurch. We went again to the port, for I very much wished to know whose yacht it was we have seen yesterday. We passed it twice. In the first time, Dina and Markevitch did not notice it, for I attracted their attention on the spot where a few months ago there was a landslide, fearing to blush. The second time, Dina exclaimed: “Oh! there is a yacht, how lovely, whose it is.” I only wanted for that, and immediately offered to ask; the carriage stopped. Dominique, our coachman, said: “It belongs to the Duke of Hamilton.” Every boat is for him — that of the Duke of Hamilton. We asked of a man, and he said he knows not. Dominique asked if it was not the Duke! But the man answered (in old dialect) he knows his perfectly and everybody knows then. I muttered some words against him: “Oh! here they know him well — he is truly a drunkard; he fell very often; all the common people know him — a scarecrow.”
I said it for others, but in my mind I was delighted to hear they know him. He must be very kind, popular; he likes to joke with common people, Mlle Collignon said, in Cairo he was always “with donkey-drivers in little carts, talking nonsense.”
Oh! he must be a jolly fellow — he is not a rigid and frigid English! He is a rascal. I adore him — for all, for his character, and all. I am sure he is the most charming man; oh, he is a splendid fellow! Oh, I do not know how to express what I think of him — I will try: charming, spiritual, gay, beautiful, joking, prideless with low people, majestic, noble — a splendid fellow, I repeat again. If even he drinks, to another I would never have forgiven it, but in him it is charming. I would talk to him, sooth his fury when drunk, suffer all his excesses. I am sure he will love me! no! If God will I would make him, with God’s help, the happiest man. But all I shall do will with His help, as ask Him for everything.
There is a Comte Lauch of the Pigeon Shooting and Duke’s circle, who always so much looks at me. I am sure he wanted to know who we were, for to-day we met him with M. Randouin, who greeted us, and seeing he seized him by the arm as if to ask: “Oh! who is it? Can you introduce me? I could not find anybody who knew them.” Perhaps Randouin will direct him to somebody who knows us. For we know almost nobody of the society. We only know Russians — old, ill-dressed people! I do not wonder if many gentlemen were not introduced; they knew nobody who knew us. Oh — perhaps God will be so good as to make us know Lambertye, and then next year at the Pigeon Shooting, and perhaps earlier, He will make us know the Duke of Hamilton. Oh! I am mad of joy! Perhaps my prayers are heard by Him, and it is His providence who caused us to meet Lambertye with Randouin. Oh God, as we stay again this winter here, do not make it in vain — make me know him! You are so great — You are so good for me; I am Your spoiled child, if I may say so. Oh! how I love him — never in my life I shall love so again, for this is the first time, and I pray God will the last. God! Lord! Lord! Do not abandon me! Hear! Hear my humble voice. Can it reach to You, almightly God? Hear it. Listen to me!

Notes

In French in the original: l’a plantée là. ↩
In French in the original: éboulement. ↩
In French in the original: C’est au duc de Hamilton. ↩
In French in the original: en vieux patois. ↩
So in Marie’s English (or in the transcription). Probably “he knows him perfectly and everybody knows him”, i.e. the man knows the Duke well and so does everyone; then may stand for them (the Duke and his party). ↩
In French in the original: ici on le connaît, c’est vraiment un ivrogne, il tombait très souvent, tous les gens du peuple le connaissent, un épouvantail. ↩
In English in the original. ↩
In French in the original: avec des âniers en petites voitures disant des bêtises. ↩
In French in the original: polisson. ↩
In French in the original: Je l’adore. ↩
spiritual: Marie’s English, from French spirituel, “witty”. ↩
In French in the original: excès. ↩
In French in the original: bataclan. ↩
In French in the original: nous a salué. ↩
In French in the original: Seigneur ! Seigneur ! Ne m’abandonne pas I (so in the transcription; evidently pas !). ↩