Diary of Marie Bashkirtseff
CZENUKFR

Monday, 11 December 1882

Saint-Marceaux1 came!!!

Saint Marceaux est venu II!

You know that my current pose consists in raising him to the skies. God, Michelangelo, and Saint-Marceaux.

Vous savez que pour le moment ma pose consiste a l'elever aux cieux. Dieu, Michel-Ange et Saint Marceaux.

I had asked him for the address of his gas fitter; he responded very kindly, and I thanked him by asking to see what he is working on at home. And he came just ten minutes before I arrived back. Isn't that vexing? I have talked about him so much these past days that, under the influence of this pose, I write him these pretentious words on my card:

Je lui avais demande l'adresse de son gazier, il a tres gentiment repondu et je l'ai remercie en demandant a voir ce qu'il fait chez lui. Et il est venu juste dix minutes avant que je rentre. C'est-y vexant ? J'en ai tant dit avant-hier que sous l'influence de cette pose je lui ecris sur ma carte ces mots pretentieux :

Desolated to have missed you... But perhaps you came in the hope of finding no one, and thus avoiding a visit to your studio?

Desolee de vous avoir manque... Mais vous etes peut-etre venu dans l'espoir de ne trouver personne et d'eviter ainsi une visite a votre atelier ?

If I am wrong to suppose you have so black a soul, prove it by returning one of these days between six and seven. Maman does not yet have a day.

Si j'ai tort de vous supposer l'ame aussi noire prouvez-le en revenant un de ces jours entre six et sept heures. Maman n'a pas encore de jour..

There are moments when life seems so sad, so dark, so empty, that one feels lost — one does not know why.

Il y a des moments ou la vie parait si triste, si noire, si vide, qu'on se sent perdu on ne sait pas pourqoi.

Notes

René de Saint-Marceaux (1845–1915): one of the most celebrated French sculptors of his generation, known for his graceful, intimate figures. Marie admires him extravagantly and has been corresponding with him. The triple exclamation mark is hers. ↩