Friday, 29 August 1876 (17 August) — Private Conversation

Miloradovitch and I very much wished to talk alone, but Paul, Eristoff or Papa would intervene as if on purpose. At last I settled into the corner which forms a sort of separate little box giving onto the stage and permitting one to see the actors preparing. Michel naturally followed me, but I sent him to fetch me some water and Gritz sat down beside me.
— I awaited you with impatience, he said, examining me curiously — [words blacked out: Paul gave me] several false alarms, and I thought you would not come at all, as last year.
— Yes, so people believed — and yet here I am.
— You have not changed at all.
— Oh! That grieves me — I was ugly.
— Hm...
— No, no — but you are always the same.
— I can see perfectly what this glass of water is about! whined the prince, handing me one. I can see it perfectly!
— Not like the one you are bringing me, which you will spill on my dress if you lean so far.
— You are unkind — you are my cousin and you are always talking to him.
— He is my childhood friend and you are a charming dandy of a day.
— Ah! It is true... dandy — yes, dandy.
I turned back to Gritz, leaving the other to place himself behind me; and paying him no further attention, we occupied ourselves only with one another. Then the memories began. It turned out that we both remembered the smallest things.
— I was courting you, then.
— Yes, that is true.
— We were both children, but how one remembers all of it — when we were children... together, is it not so?
— Yes.
Gritz is an old man in spirit — it is so strange to hear this rosy-cheeked young man speak of serious, domestic, practical matters. He asked me whether I had a good lady's maid, and then:
— It is good that you have studied so much — for when you have children.