Diary of Marie Bashkirtseff
CZENUKFR

Tuesday, 9 November 1875

[Written across the page: What nonsense! He had not left me in the lurch — it was I, rather, who had rebuffed him, thinking I was doing better.]
Bihovetz tells fortunes marvellously. He announces the letter to me — the famous letter that is to bring so much upheaval and change.
A disappointment for now, vexations too — but the future is so beautiful that I dare not believe it; nothing but riches and happiness.
I shall prefer a fair-haired man, and then I shall often think of a fair-haired man and perhaps regret him. Such is the prophecy of the charming general. The cards will make me foolish — it is like a disease.
Atrocious weather; I have been pale since Sunday evening, since that frightening pallor. I am still astonished I have not come down with jaundice.
We were at Mme de Ballore's, then I go to Nina's with Dina, while the mothers go home.
I arrive quite gay, dancing and joking, and I am fond of Giroflé — it is not her fault if the accursed Girofla chooses her to torment me. She is so harmless.
Do you know, they are beginning to mention me in the newspapers, and to cite me at extraordinary performances? A wretched sort of honour!
Speaking of "fichu" — listen to this:
Fortunate Father!
Your wretched son, for his virtue, is to be crowned Rosière by the prompter of the Théâtre Français, in the presence of M. Cresci; the male and female choruses of the Italian Theatre, who will sing several pieces from the Stabat Mater; MM. Piano, sieurs Avette, Pipon and Ricci of the Maison Dorée; Gagery and Antoine of the London House; Defly, architect of the Tour; Ardigo of the Hôtel des Dames; the head waiter of La Victoire; the head waiters of the Cercle de la Méditerranée; the doorman of the Cercle Masséna; Andriot; Saëtone; the young lady at the counter of the Café Américain; Courba, chief clerk to maître Desforges, notary; Desforges himself; Balestro, concierge of Mme Gioia; Louise, her chambermaid; the employees charged with sweeping the streets of Nice; the waiters of the Cercle des Bons Amis; the head chef of the restaurant de la Réserve; the proprietor of the Cours restaurant; the waiters charged with service in the private dining rooms of the Restaurant Français; Mme Vial, the café proprietress; the head assistant of the Belle Jardinière; the wine steward of the Hôtel du Midi; Michel, fencing master, rue Maccarani; the prefect of the Alpes-Maritimes; Mme Planta, midwife, avenue de la Gare; two gendarmes; and M. Limousin — all of whom have testified to his good conduct.
The ceremony will take place on Sunday 14 November 1875, in the hall of the Folies Niçoises theatre, after the performance.
Fortunate Father! You shall attend the crowning of your son.
This will be sent to M. Léon d'Audiffret.
So this wretched son occupies me greatly? By God!
What an ugly thing life is, when one is bored! This boy causes me pain! Why did I displease him!
I take my Graces home to dinner and we make an infernal racket. And these are young ladies! Fie! [Crossed out: We scream—]
Later I shall not understand what I am laughing at now — for half an hour we sing bim! bam! or Bibi! and spend the next half-hour laughing about it. What happy times!
Ah! How lovely it is this evening! And no one under my window!
Wretched city!
Oh! How very tedious it all is!

Notes

A rosière was traditionally a virtuous village maiden crowned with roses for her good conduct — applied here to a man, with biting irony. ↩