Wednesday, 20 June 1883

*Thursday, 21 June 1883*

I continue to model until noon — this is the third week and I already have three complete compositions which Tony finds good; the third came together all at once... It is easier than painting as work and study...

Tomorrow is the awards ceremony; they sent me the list of those honoured — and my name in it, painting section... It looks well... But I hesitate to go; it is not worth the trouble — and yet if... Do I know... Inexplicable fears.