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Tuesday, 20 October 1874
Mardi, 20 octobre 1874 Maman a dit qu'elle est dégoûtée de me voir rougir pour Audiffret. Moi aussi cela me dégoûte mais est-ce ma faute ? Je ne sais pour quel péché je rougis pour cet homme.
Maman said she is disgusted to see me blush for Audiffret. I too am disgusted by it, but is it my fault? I do not know for what sin I blush for this man.
It rains all day. I go out for one hour in a closed carriage with Dina and do not open my mouth.
Georges continues his drinking and I am indignant. Ah! The lessons worry me; they are not yet arranged and my conscience is not at ease. This instant I go up to my study to work on the arrangement of the hours.