Monday 30 August 1875

Plevasko again until half past three. I am impatient — I have errands to do. I accomplish nothing.
We have a lawsuit — let us endure its inconveniences.
Besides, one does not demean oneself by knowing this man — he is a celebrity in Russia. We take him and his wife — a plump, fresh-complexioned person — to the Bois.
I do not know for what sin I have the feeling that everyone who passes is laughing at me. I have days like that, and they are the most vexing of my life. In the courtyard I meet my Brazilian and blush.
Just as we are entering the Bois, Audiffret comes out. In a little straw hat! Fie! The creature. Since the boor has the audacity to move very quickly, it is only on turning back that they recognise each other — my aunt and he; those are the ones I mean by "they." I did not move, and I did not blush.
It seemed to me that he did not greet us, and I became inwardly furious — not because of the man, but because everyone turns away from us.
Since my aunt's head was between his and mine, I did not see him tip his hat. My aunt says he greeted us very well — so much the better! So much the better for my poor pride.
It rains but we nonetheless complete the circuit of the cascade and so on, since it is for Madame Plevasko who has never seen the Bois and who leaves tomorrow or the day after.
I have been cheerful since the day I became so at Schlangenbad — questa cara Gioia di Schlangenbad! I do not know where this gaiety comes from, and I am astonished at its duration and afraid it may suddenly cease.
On the way back, around a quarter past seven, along the Champs-Élysées, we see the celebrated man — homo celeber — going like an arrow towards the Bois, this time in a top hat. It is growing dark and the lamps are already being lit. It is my aunt who recognises him — she is concerned with him, God forgive me, even more than I am, this saintly woman who loves me so dearly.
I play the capricious, the vexed one — I laugh and she laughs. I prefer being with her to being with Maman: she is more my companion, while still looking after me, taking care of all my affairs.
I trouble myself with nothing when I am with her — I desire and she executes. Sometimes she contradicts me; then I whimper, I work myself into impossible states, I am on edge, and she ends by doing as I wish, which is where she should begin. Besides, I am very reasonable — I want only what is necessary.
Ah, my God, let everything work itself out for the winter!
She speaks to me of Girofla, and I tell her that I am angry at not having him — that I am put out that he takes no notice of me whatsoever.
Ah! if only he had done nothing provoking. But he has done and said just enough to annoy me, the rogue — he has calculated it all, the scoundrel. Besides, my dear, if the man interested me to the degree you imagine, I should not speak of it to you at all.
I say all of this to my aunt — I tell her everything I write and think about the man and this whole unfortunate Giro-fliesque affair.
Let us not forget to mention that we encountered Lucie Durand and our dear Fedus — this charming Lambertye has dyed his moustache and what little hair he has left.